It’s a depressing time for the AF. Sitting in its underwear watching football is all the poor guy lives for. Get up in the afternoon, fumble through the fridge for leftovers, a quick jaunt through Twitter, a few episodes of something naff on Netflix and then the game on TV. All before slumping on the sofa with a takeaway and a few cans. Just to help the poor soul back to sleep.

But this is the week we’ve been dreading. It’s the international break. There is no football until Thursday, and nothing on Sunday either. This is a disaster.

It’s not so much the lack of quality football – the AF will watch anything, after all – but it’s the fact that we’re about to have a rather light-looking week of almost literally nothing to look forward to. AF will probably have to venture outside and talk to real people.

And you too might have to make plans outside of the loving embrace of Sky and BT Sport! AF says: if your relationship is on the rocks, here’s your week to try and save it!

Here’s your lot – it’s slim pickings this week.

Thursday

A whole lot of nothing until Thursday night turns to sheer desperation. Wales host Northern Ireland in a Home Nations friendly match that sort of feels like a game played out on the deck of the ship of the damned souls.

Wales won’t have Gareth Bale, their most recognisable player by a wide margin. Northern Ireland will be without Chris Brunt – depressingly one oftheir most recognisable faces.

But after a long week, this is live football. And it’s on the Beeb. In Wales. What more could you ask for? A couple of beers to get you through it, perhaps.

You can watch….

Wales 0-0 Northern Ireland – 7.45pm – BBC 2 Wales

Friday

Friday is Good Friday – always good for some Football League action, that is. Swindon Town face promotion-chasing Wigan Athletic in League One, which should whet the appetite before one of the greatest showdowns in international football: Republic of Ireland v Switzerland. Who could forget Hakan Yakin’s goals against Ireland in Euro 2004 qualification? No one, that’s who!

You can watch…

Swindon Town 0-3 Wigan Athletic – 5.30pm – Sky Sports 1

Republic of Ireland 0-1 Switzerland – 7.45pm

Saturday

After the long Good Friday, Saturday does bring some sort of excitement into the life of the flagging AF. It’s surely the highlight of the week: spending the afternoon watching replays of the 1966 World Cup final and of that night in Munich when England triumphed 5-1, AF will be getting into the mood for England’s trip to Germany on Saturday night.

It’s a chance to see what the likes of Danny Drinkwater and Jamie Vardy can do against the world champions on their own turf, and a chance to see if England can win the Euros this summer.

Though you probably don’t really need to watch the match to answer those questions… Round the evening off with some live MLS action as DC United take on FC Dallas, where the star of the show is surely Alvaro Saborio and his 105 caps for Costa Rica. AF highly recommends this game if you have trouble sleeping.

You can watch…

Switzerland U21 1-1 England U21 – 6.00pm – BT Sport Europe

Germany 3-0 England – 7.45pm – ITV 1

DC United 1-0 FC Dallas – 9.30pm Sky Sports 5